Dates

Many of you who know Su are probably wondering how on earth the both of us wound up together. Likewise, many of you who know me are probably asking the same thing too. For the better part, I've been not wanting to explain myself (thank you all for not asking - but your expressions are evident when you see the both of us together). Granted, both Su & I are very much different in personalities, mannerisms (I almost always make myself at home wherever I am), character and a whole lot more.

I first met Su online, via a dating site. I must admit, the picture she posted (can't seem to load it up though) caught my attention enough to send her a message (ok, personally I do feel that physical attraction is important. You must like what you see right?) She responded and although we did not hit it off well, Alhamdulilah, we are together now. I met her mother to formally inform that I was dating Su, and hat she should not be too worried if she comes home a lil' late, because in the most likely instance, she'll be with me. A few weeks later, I hinted marriage.

How could anyone not fall in love with this girl? All right, she'll probably fit ino what most Singaporeans would call a "Blur Sotong". She can be sometimes, especially when she's not interested in the activity at hand. But she tries. She would also be the kind of person where you would generally term as having "no direction". True to some aspects. But the thing I've realised is, what is deemed as acceptable to society as a norm, does not necessairly agree with her. That's why she's as care-free as they come. And I love her for it! She does not give in to pressure to conform (she's NEVER one to conform, unless it's something that she likes or politcally agree with), she's never afraid to be different. I am sure, for most of the people reading this who knows Su personally, what I've mentioned has only scratched the surface of this wonderfuly person. That's why she makes friends. Unlike me. I manage people.

I've been so blessed during the month of Ramadan. Even though the toughest challenge was during this time, the most blessed of moments that we shared was also during this period. The Terawehs, breaking of fast, meeting new friends, etc. Alhamdulilah, every step of the way, Su has always been in my sight. The only time that we did not meet was the first couple of days of Raya. Other than that, ever since the month of Ramadan, we've been inseperable! Alhamdulilah! I can never thank Him ever enough!

With her, I was exposed to many different perspectives on topics or subjects that I thought I knew well enough of. Her views can come accross as simplistic or non-sophisticated. But fact of the matter is, if you're daring enough to fish for more information, you'll be impressed as I was, about her views. Understanding her, as she would put it herself, would be trying to understand her lifestyle. She values religion, prayers and all things associated with the giving to society. And I am not talking about giving "back". Giving while not having gained, is a concept that was relatively new to me. In fact, I slowly grew to develop that insticnt as well, Alhamdulilah! Fardu Kifayah.

The change can often be noticed from my friends who've known me for years. Shashi, Ho, Jibson (Jibson, although not your typical philosopher, he is a pious person) could see a gradual change. Not measure in "good", "bad" or anything, but just a change. Alhamdulilah! I would love to think of it as a "good" change indeed. But I'll make it easy on myself and try not to evalulate my own standing. It's good enough I'm not cursing as much.

Su has been very much involved in my development as a muslim. Well, I did make the decision to convert suddenly. Her fear was not unfounded that I would be "shocked". I did take out some of my frustrations out on her, and others too. Insya Allah, I will be forgiven by Him and all those whom I've hurt along the way. I strive not to be the fool that I was, and still probably am.

She has been the only girl who've told me off when I get above-board. And I truly apppreciate her being vocal. I know that she's truly pissed at me when she scolds me because her tolerance is extremely high for me. Insya Allah, there would be not much raised voices or tears. I really hate to make her drip tears of disappointment for me. Insya Allah, I would be a better person, muslim, and husband to her.

I've also learnt that even with her work experiences overseas and her dealings with high-level decision makers, she remains her "child-like" qualities. She's never had to demand from me to satisfy her cravings for coffee, ice-cream or foods. I do need to be reminded, but I derieve so much joy from seeing her enjoy herself. I love watching her eat. It's so endearing that she's so shy to ask me to finish her food (she usually eats less than half a portion. Lucky me!). That's my job baby. No need to feel embaressed about it!

I love seeing her at the library. She has carried on this habit of reading since she was young to this day. Insya Allah, it'll continue. I most enjoy her asking me for a house as a dowry. Conventionally, it would be a token amount of a few grand. And I truly and sincerely loved her idea of me giving her a piece of property (Insya Allah, I will, and not stop at one). A safeguard for the future. Shows how much she values the family that we intend to form. Alhamdulilah!

Sometimes I would just want too dress her up in nice elagant clothes. I've seen her in dresses, heels and makeup. She looks so pretty. The last time that happened, she was dressing up for Sheila Majid. The rest of the times, it doesn't matter if her clothes are not color co-ordinated, as long as she is comfy, and well-covered. That's all that matters to her. And many times, I've to tell myself that her happiness is all that ever matters to me. Afterall, I don't even own a designer shirt (I do own a few designer pants though!). She just looks beautiful to me in whatever she wears! I love you Su!

I've an email from her since May this year. How can I not feel blessed after her touching words. Till today, I still read and re-read her mails. Alhamdulilah! Insya Allah, I will be the best person for her.

*******************************

salam sayang my dear

How's ur work been? I am preparing to go to CG now. wa
hahah late!!

anyways..just want to say something to u..

Jeremy Amir Hamzah Wong Sheh Liang ..

Wo Ai Ni!! hehehehe


being a girlfriend is a new experience for me. 

But do believe that whatever i do for you, I mean no
harm or ill intention. it is just me and my blur
ways.. hehehe...

Do forgive me for my unintended inconsideration
towards you.

Moreover, we have faced many challenges ahead.  I
appreciate all the challenges wehave faced together
because they allowed me to learn more about you. 

I hope you have learnt more about me and didnt
disappoint u that much.. hehehe

We can ride these low times together.. Insya Allah..
we will. They may not be the best of times, but my
love for you and Allah.. will be the most rewarding
for us...

Lihubullah...

Suraya 

*******************************

Insya Allah, we would form a family soon, based on a foundation of strong religion focus. Just like Rosli and Sheeren. They have sort of become a model for me to follow. Alhamdulilah! I managed to learn to recite the Tashawood Awal, and Insya Allah, more of the Surrahs as well as perform the prayer call. I badly wish for that to happen. I think that I may just need to add in the extra effort to memorise the words (romanised first), and acentuate my pronunciation, Insya Allah.

I love you. And I pray for strength that I would love to begin courting you once we are married, Insya Allah! Forgive me of may failures and short-comings dear. This is my first time being with someone special...

Loving you, even after forever...
because forever's too short...
Lihubullah

jahwsl
0143
22 Nov 06