We Stand Alone Together

Ahamdulilah! I've been doing all my 5 required prayers everyday (ok... not at the prescibed times... but I try). Sometimes (all right... most of the times) I like to gather all my prayers and spend an hour in the mosque praying. I find almost any excuse to go to the mosque! And Insya Allah, I will have more days of fun!


Sunat Hajat prayers is one of my favourite prayer protocol. It's the time when I can speak in english to Him. It's also the time when I can improvise my praying methods. Don't get me wrong. I like doing Jemaah prayers. The trouble is, I do not understand most of the time, the meaning of the prayers. I am pretty much monkey see, monkey do. I raise my hands when everyone else does. I say Amin when they say, a split second later. I do enjoy a mass prayer, but I can get pretty lost most of the times.

Sunat Hajat allows me to express myself freely. I hope and pray that one day, Su & me will be able to do that prayer as a married couple, Insya Allah.

It's not so much of asking Him for things during this prayer of requests. It's about knowing that He hears me. As Jesus once prayed before the night of The Cruxifixtion, "Lord, let this cup pass before me, but if it is Thy Will, let it be done". How wonderful his total submission to God! Ahamdulilah! This prayer is used in every single mass, before the holy communion. His prayer shows that in this time, he is man. Normal, ordinary, common. He showed his fear as well as his insecurity. The catholics do not worship Jesus per se. It is his element that is praise-worthy. Unfortunately, some people do get the wrong idea. Many, in fact do. Insya Allah, they will see the Truth that was designed for us Man... Insya Allah, God will guide them to read and learn more!

I submit to him and accept that my prayers are amongst the countless that go before Him every single second. It is with sincerity that I say this. As long as He knows that I praise him, glorify Him and thank Him for all that He has done and given to me... Insya Allah, surely we are promised to be in the garden of heaven! Insya Allah!

It is tough to hope and pray every single day, especially a person like me does not believe in destiny or fate. I do understand and accept divine will, but I would also like to think that I am in control of my life. How silly of me. Could I have forgiven Su's mother and try to patch up by myself? Could Fauz have forgiven me for the things that I have done? Ahamdulilah! Allah, among all people have showed me that the people who does not seem to carry His Teachings, carry the most! And the most dilligent of them they are! Ahamdulilah! I am ashamed! Having been across many parts of the world, seeing most things people can only imagine to see, knowing things that most people have the luxury not to know has made me an arrogant person. I have forsaken Him. In all honesty, I have been touched by Fuaz, a person I least expect, to show me what a true muslim is. Forgiving and caring. Ahamdulilah! May Allah bless her!

Suraya has taught me the value of prayer. In the initial times when we dated, she had not qualms about picking up and leaving to pray during times of prayer. There is very very seldom a time when she would miss and payback the particular prayer. Ahamdulilah and praises to Him for allowing me to meet Su. Stubborn in the right ways (sometimes) and loving in many other ways... Insya Allah, we will build our family (four kids... she wants four kids!) with the foundation of hope, faith and chasity for the love of Allah! Insya Allah!

jahwsl
0309
03 Nov 06'